Dear Hormones…

Dear Hormones,

I think that you should know that the postpartum period hasn’t been all rainbows and fairy unicorn princesses.

In addition to wobbly mommy-tummy, stretch-marks and boobs that go up and down two or three cup sizes on a daily basis, I’ve had mind-crushing fatigue and vicious mood swings.

It’s taken three months for my perineum to resorb the stiches used to repair a tear and remodel the scar tissue so that normal recreational activities are somewhat enjoyable again.

I wander around covered in fresh (leakage) and curdled (spit-up) boob milk.

I’ve only just been able to readjust my skin care regimine to get rid of both dry flakes and acne at the same time.

But this?

Really?

I’m.  Loosing.  My.  Hair.

In large gobs.

You know in the movies or on TV when someone starts chemotherapy and there is a required shot of them in the shower enjoying the hot water and steam and then they pull their hand away from their head and the camera zooms in on the clump of hair in their hand and then pans up to show the expression on their face?

That’s me.

Okay, I know I’m not on chemotherapy and my problems are more joys than problems and I don’t mean to belittle the courage shown by people who actually have cancer…

But my hair is coming out in large gobs.  My hair, that was never thick or luxurious in any shape or form but baby fine and limp.  My hair, that maybe, if you squinted, might have looked marginally thicker when I was pregnant.

I mean, I love you hormones.  You allowed me to ovulate and carry a baby and produce milk for him…but did you have to tease me with this hair thing?  Having my hair fall out in gobs is really screwing with my already shaky-in-the-light-of-post-partum-body-losing-my-career-for-the-moment self-image.  Hormones, please give me a break before my husband makes me done rubber gloves and excavate the shower drain.

Sincerly,

The Adequate Mother

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4 comments

  1. VeritasLiberat · · Reply

    Happened to me too. I had to cut bangs to cover up the thin spots on both temples. Came back eventually.

    1. Bangs! What a good idea! Calling hair salon….

  2. My husband started chemotherapy about three and a half months after our twins were born. My daily shed pile was significantly larger than his. Quite depressing, particularly after he shaved his head and I just continued to pull out chunks. Hair salon is key, both during the loss phase and the dreaded wisps that will soon follow.

  3. Michelle · · Reply

    My new baby is 5 months old, and I still have a handful come out in the shower every day. Like you, I have fine hair, though it’s a bit curly. Therefore, I have a frizzy mess on a good day. Now I have a frizzy thin mess with visible patches of scalp at the temples.

    So. Wrong. And yes, it’s like the ultimate prank: not only is your body mushy, sore, foreign and at the beck and call of a tiny being whose sole purpose in life at this point seems to be proving the effectiveness of sleep deprivation as a torture technique.

    Now you’re going bald. Happy Mother’s Day!

    *headdesk*

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